Desire

Its incredibly unfair that I cannot have you all to myself, or that I can not have whatever and who ever I want. Why should I be denied all the pleasures in life that I so desire just because its "immoral"??? After a very recent realization, I am learning to embrace the fact that I am incredibly possesive and territorial, maybe even selfish. BUT only when it comes to people. I'm not materialistic in the least, but if you are a person involved in my life in some way, you now belong to me. I don't want anyone to love you more than I do. I don't want anyone else to feel the way I feel if you die, or if you run away, or if you need help. I want to be THE ONE for you. ME. No one else. I feel more deserving than anyone else in your life because I know that no one else will ever be what I can be for you. If you would only let me be free, I could change the world for you and for everyone else. I could educate you and make you see that you need me. You NEED me to be the one for everything.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not that crazy. I just feel like this right now, and felt the need to share how I feel, which is the soul purpose of this blog. Take it how you will, I don't care. I also know that personally, I need a lot of different people in my life to feel satisfied, so I can't expect you to only need me. I just want you to need me first. And I want to be allowed to be needed by everyone.

I am so my mother.