Thursday
Gettin Crazy With The Cheese Whiz
So as I sit here, listening to Beck and watching a muted Law and Order SVU, I think about why. I don't like thinking about why. Its extremely frustrating. Frustration is something I cannot cope with very well. Well I can't really cope with anything "well", but frustration has got to be one of the most difficult ones for sure. Why does my dad have cancer? Why do I have two healthy and intelligent sons? Why am I married? Why am I unhappy? Why do I draw so many different kinds of people towards myself? Why did Matt kill himself? Why am I becoming more and more interested in a romantic affair with a woman? Why don't I believe in God anymore? Why do I like Justin Bieber? Why do I care about people who don't care about me? Why am I so naive? Why do I want to wear dresses and curl my hair and buy pretty shoes? Why do I want to run away and never come back? Why can't I just focus on the love and goodness? Why am I here? What EXACTLY is my purpose? I need to stop rambling.
Subject Material
complications
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1 comment:
Very sad face :(...... Because that is a part of life. If you didn't ask why you would not be real. It's very hard to deal with pain and suffering I know and (yes i do) understand what you are going through, my best advise to you is to think really hard about what you really think is right in life and go for it. As far as dealing with all the micro "why's" look at each one individually, for example "why does my dad have cancer?" he just does. What makes you sad about it? Is it the fact that you wont get to spend any more time with him? Then instead of feeling really bad about it all the time, think of what you are going to do about it...hang out with him? invite him over for coffee, find a way to make the best of what you can with him, forget about the bad part and enjoy the good part. Then you wont sit there going on about why and you will sit there and think that was fun and I will sure as hell miss that awesome guy. I am not saying this is what you should do. I am just giving you an example of how to confront this "why" and how you could make it a "i did, and loved it, even at times forgot all about it". Casey I love you very much, I don't like to see you so sad(all the time lately) just remember that I am here for you not matter what. I am also sure there a a lot of other people out there that also care very much about you as well.
Love you always and forever!
LMH
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